A Gentleman’s Manual for Becoming a Good Man

“Read before bed every night.”

If you want to read something really special this weekend and perhaps be able to share it with your kids, try “Rules for My Unborn Son” by Walker Lamond.

This book has never made it to a bestseller list but is a real gem that deserves more attention. It offers timeless advice and reflections that resonate with both fathers and sons. If “Fifty Shades of Grey” has never been on your reading list, you will love this book.

One of the book’s highlights is its appendix, which features a list of Essential Reading for Boys. This addition makes it an excellent gift for your son, complete with a personal dedication on the first page. The list will also allow you to see if you are up to snuff yourself.

Below are 100 quotes from the book that have resonated widely. Inspired by one of the rules,

“If you’re going to quote someone, get it right,”

I have ensured these quotes are accurate and added some of my favorites. While you might disagree with some of the rules, they are sure to inspire and provoke thought.

If you enjoy Walker Lamond’s writing, consider visiting his Blog. For fathers of beautiful daughters: he wrote “Rules for My Newborn Daughter” as well. You may explore his other books here.

No, I am not affiliated. But if you find this list interesting, share this book recommendation with your friends:

“Support friends in the arts. Especially if they stink.”

  1. There are plenty of ways to enter a pool. The stairs is not one of them.
  2. Never cancel dinner plans by text message.
  3. Never leave a job without securing your next employment. But when it’s time to go, don’t hesitate.
  4. Identify your most commonly used word or phrase and eliminate it.
  5. Always use “we” when referring to your home team or your government.
  6. When entrusted with a secret, keep it.
  7. Ride in the front car of a roller-coaster.
  8. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.
  9. When in doubt, wear a tie.
  10. You only get one chance to notice a new haircut.
  11. There is exactly one place where it is acceptable to wear gym clothes.
  12. Never park in front of a bar.
  13. Expect the seat in front of you to recline. Prepare accordingly.
  14. Keep a picture of your first fish, first car, and first girl/boyfriend.
  15. When you are older, coach.
  16. Surround yourself with smart people.
  17. Never lie to your doctor.
  18. All guns are loaded.
  19. If your teacher forgets to assign homework, keep quiet.
  20. The best way to show thanks is to wear it. Even if it’s only once.
  21. Take a vacation from your cell phone, internet, and TV once a year.
  22. Don’t fill up on bread, no matter how good it is.
  23. A handshake beats an autograph.
  24. Don’t linger in the doorway. In or out.
  25. If the maître d’ mistakes you for someone famous, there’s no rush to correct him.
  26. On Sunday Morning, a gentleman gets dressed. Remember, it’s the first day of the week, not the last.
  27. Be careful not to ogle girls at the beach. That’s what sunglasses are for.
  28. Be mindful of what comes between you and the Earth. Always buy good shoes, tires, and sheets.
  29. Never eat lunch at your desk if you can avoid it.
  30. Short pants are for little boys. Decide for yourself when you are a man.
  31. Eat lunch with the new kids.
  32. Smile at pretty girls.
  33. It’s never too late for an apology.
  34. Always meet your date at the door.
  35. If you have right of way, TAKE IT.
  36. You don’t get to choose your own nickname.
  37. When you marry someone, remember you marry their entire family.
  38. Traveling to a foreign city is an excuse to dress up, not down.
  39. Under no circumstances should you ask a woman if she is pregnant.
  40. Absolutely no piercings or tattoos, unless you are in the armed forces.
  41. Don’t make a scene.
  42. When giving a thank you speech, short and sweet is best.
  43. Buy regular gas.
  44. Don’t Spit on the Sidewalk.
  45. Invest in great luggage.
  46. Make time for your mom on your birthday, It’s her special day too.
  47. When opening presents, no one likes a good guesser.
  48. Sympathy is a crutch, never fake a limp.
  49. Give credit. Take Blame.
  50. Make yourself useful on a boat. If you can’t tie knots, fetch the beers.
  51. Never be the last one in the pool.
  52. Don’t stare.
  53. Address everyone that carries a firearm professionally as Sir or Ma’am.
  54. Stand up to bullies. You’ll only have to do it once.
  55. If you’ve made your point, stop talking.
  56. Admit it when you’re wrong. Mean it.
  57. If you offer to help don’t quit until the job is done.
  58. Look people in the eye when you thank them.
  59. Thank the bus driver.
  60. Until you are a doctor, never answer your phone at the dinner table.
  61. Forgive yourself for your mistakes.
  62. Know at least one good joke.
  63. Don’t boo. Even the ref is somebody’s son.
  64. Stand up for the little guy. He’ll remember you.
  65. Learn to drive a stick shift.
  66. Be cool to younger kids. Reputations are built over a lifetime.
  67. It’s okay to go to the movies by yourself.
  68. Dance with your mother/father.
  69. Don’t lose your cool. Especially at work.
  70. Always thank the host.
  71. If you don’t understand, ask before it’s too late.
  72. Know her dress size. Don’t ask.
  73. There is nothing wrong with a plain t-shirt.
  74. Be a good listener. Don’t just take your turn to talk.
  75. Keep your word.
  76. In college always sit in the front. You’ll stand out immediately. Come grade time it might come in handy.
  77. Carry your mother’s bags. She carried you for 9 months.
  78. Be patient with airport security. They are just doing their job.
  79. Socks are not necessary in the summer, no matter how formal the occasion.
  80. When you are a houseguest, be sure to wake up before your hosts.
  81. You are what you do. Not what you say.
  82. Learn to change a tire.
  83. Men should not wear sandals. Ever.
  84. An hour with grandparents is time well spent. Ask for advice when you need it.
  85. Don’t litter.
  86. If you have a sister, get to know her boyfriend. Your opinion is important.
  87. You won’t always be the strongest or fastest. But you can be the toughest.
  88. On stage is no time to be shy.
  89. You aren’t done raking until you’ve played in the leaf pile.
  90. Make the little things count.
  91. At funerals, a dark suit is fine. You shouldn’t own a black one.
  92. There is a fine line between looking sultry and slutty. Find it.
  93. You’re never too old to need your mom.
  94. Ladies, if you make the decision to wear heels on the first date commit to keeping them on and toning down how much your feet kill.
  95. Know the words to your national anthem.
  96. Your dance moves might not be the best, but I promise making a fool of yourself is more fun than sitting on the bench alone.
  97. Smile at strangers.
  98. Make Goals.
  99. Wait for your song to play on the jukebox.
  100. If you HAVE to fight, punch first and punch hard.

P.S. This book – and the Appendix in particular – is a good meditation aid for Father’s Day. Feel free to share it with your team, family, and friends.

NB: our #COMA Gallery is always open to those craving a dose of leadershit endurance or seeking an extra shot of (de)motivation on the fly. And of course, VIP entrance is perpetually open — because sometimes, you deserve exclusive access to the absurdity.

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